PVV/review – watching porn in a theatre with friends while reminiscing about undergrad, or AMK’s Revenge of the Petites (2012) premier

Honestly – I haven’t been out and about in Westwood since I graduated from UCLA in 2000.

But last night, I was back down on Broxton in the middle of the West ‘hood for the premier of AMKingdom’s Revenge of the Petites (2012).

It was weird.

Westwood has changed a lot, I took the opportunity to have dinner at an old haunt (what a gilded memory I had, dang!!), and the traffic is just as horrific. But none of that really constituted weird. Weird came later. Let me explain…

Revenge of the Petites is a cute movie. Imagine Revenge of the Nerds (1984) meets Fast Times at Ridgemont High (1982) – it even looked like those films (old style-like… I have no idea what the actual film term for that is, but I’m sure there is one… anyone?). It wasn’t a parody, though – more of a light-hearted porno nod to early ’80s teen sex comedies. (are you even allowed to write “teen sex comedies” these days??)

Anyway, here’s the synopsis and the trailer:

“In Revenge of the Petites, Marie and her best friend Skin embark on their freshman year of college. They soon realize college life is not as easy as it seems. Subjected to the taunts, teasing and practical jokes of the tall and beautiful girls of Theta House, led by the vicious Vanessa, Marie and her friends are left with no choice but to join a sorority for other petite girls. When one cruel, practical joke by the girls of Theta House goes too far, the petites have had enough. With the help of a former member of Theta House, the petites set out to get their revenge in the hilarious and heartfelt coming of age story.” (sic)

 

Nothing weird about that, and nothing weird about having a big premier event for a film that features an absolute gaggle of up-and-coming adult starlets. Consider: Marie McCray, Skin Diamond, Vanessa Cage, Celeste Star, Dani Daniels, Zoey Kush, Riley Reed, Heidi Hanson, Katie St. Ives, Victoria Rae Black, and Hayden Hawkens… and more!!

Holy goodness, Revenge of the Petites‘ cast list is pretty comprehensive capture of chics big in the young girl/”teen” genre today. But the weird…?

(pictured: starlet gaggle plus some boys from twitter)

The weird came in the watching.

The event itself was pretty typical – Landmark theatre, red carpet set up outside, all the usual industry photographer and PR suspects, and the lovely and amazing Kirsten Price interviewing those meandering down the velvet walkway.

Inside, with the exception of a not-too-large poster board of the film’s box art, it was everyday movie-theatre typical – a regular concession stand featuring standard fare (no “’80s teen sex comedy porno”-special beverages) and a not-too-high-tech theatre with tons of seating.

I sat towards the back, theatre right, with a buddy of mine. I was super happy when another buddy said hi and sat behind us. As the theatre began to fill up (by the time the film started, I would say the entire place was about half full, with people dispersed throughout), it seemed like the film’s stars were concentrating towards the middle, theatre left.

(pictured: I am not a photographer, but it’s Kirsten Price… I promise)

After a brief intro, a few words from ATK’s Kim Nielsen, and some exposition from director Harry Sparks, Revenge of the Petites began…

…and it was cute!! Silly, with some plot holes and mistakes in the first five minutes even, but cute – really on par with the film era it was attempting to reinvoke (so maybe those blips were on purpose?). There was some nudity, but nudity that was also genre homage appropriate like soapy boobs in the shower shots (tee hee). There were a few brief glimpses of boy-girl hardcore as one of the sorority chics fantasized about herself and the gym teacher/athletics instructor/Talon, but this was cut in a way that actually made it fun.

But eventually, a girl-girl scene between the film’s two main mean girls began… unedited and uncut. Eek.

Now, don’t get me wrong – I have no problem with unedited and uncut girl-girl content, and it was a good scene… rather vigorous, hott, and interesting in its grainy early-’80s style… and it’s not like I don’t watch porn – all kinds of porn – pretty often (really often)… but it was weird to watch an entire sex scene in a Landmark theatre next to a buddy and near another pal.

The scene went on forever.

I committed the ultimate public movie watching faux pas and tweeted (!!!!!) as I sat there wondering… why is this weird? The group of performers up front were cheering on the girls’ work and singing the films’ extremely catchy songs. A well-known industry personality sitting in front of me was commenting jovially and loudly, and me and my pal were making comments of our own about giant vaginas on screen. But every other adult premier I have ever attended either cut the sex substantially or cut it out altogether. And as I sat through the entire display, I found myself wishing for the brief snatches of hardcore we’d seen previously.

When the next, seemingly inconsequential but obviously to-be-uncut girl-girl scene began, me and my pal decide to leave. The friend behind us was already long gone.

It was a nice night, so we chatted some as we strolled to our respective vehicles. Diddy Riese was as packed as it’s ever been, and I thought long and hard about cookies and ice cream. Then, as I took my leave of the West ‘hood, listing to some Chronic 2000 that was serendipitously on the radio (yes, I know it was eventually renamed, but back when I first heard it was 2000), I wondered why… why was that experience uncomfortable for me?

I still don’t know the answer… and I did like what bits of the film I saw… but I’ll just make sure to watch the second half of Revenge of the Petites in the privacy of my office #justsayin

 (pictured: world premier!!!!!!!!)

Recommended for: ’80s film and culture aficionados, fans of girl-girl content (that’s most of what I saw, and it was good) and the young girl/”teen” adult genre, and the lighthearted!!

 

Notables

With performances by: Marie McCray, Skin Diamond, Vanessa Cage, Celeste Star, Dani Daniels, Cassandra Nix, Ashley Jane, Zoey Kush, Riley Reid, Kris Slater, Sativa Verte, Heidi Hanson, Katie St. Ives, Seth Dickens, Victoria Rae Black, Tia Cyrus, Nina Devon, Hayden Hawkens, Leilani Leeane,Talon, Sarah Shevon and James Deen.

Revenge of the Petites was written and directed by Harry Sparks for AMKingdom. It’s not out yet, but you can pre-order here.

(buy your copy and/or watch it now here)

I have no idea about the BTS here, but I hear that there is something like eight hours’ worth of content available on the three disc collector’s edition.

 

If you’re interested in a more literal (and super awesome) Revenge of the Nerds adult parody, check out PVV’s review of 3rd Degree Films’ Official Revenge of the Nerds Parody (2011).

* * *

Like what you see? Follow PVV on Facebook and Twitter and/or follow Dr. Chauntelle at @DrChauntelle!!

You may quote anything herein with the following attribution: “Reprinted from Porn Valley Vantage/PVVOnline, copyright © Chauntelle Anne Tibbals, PhD (www.PVVOnline.com).”

PVVOnline – Critical Commentary on Adult Production